Doctor Who, Minecraft, and a Donkey Named “Danger”

As you all know, we’re nerds.  Big ol’ sci-fi, video game, comic book loving nerds.  We’ve raised The Peeshwank to follow in our footsteps because, let’s face it, nerds are the best.

So this series of conversations made me laugh a lot more than it probably should have…

In the car:

P: Danger is dead!

Me: Excuse me?

P: Danger.  He’s my donkey in Minecraft. [He assured me it was NOT a reference to Anthony Weiner, although he giggled a lot when Joe asked him if the donkey’s first name was Carlos.]

Me: Oh.  What happened?

P: Well, he was just standing there when Jerk McCrapface came up and murdered him.  Murdered him!  Right there in front of my house!

Me: I’m sorry.  Why did you let… um… Jerk McCrapface come to your house.

P: He told me he was a Doctor Who fan, so I let him teleport to me.  But I think he must’ve been lying.  A true Whovian would never kill another Whovian’s donkey, would he?

Me: No.  Absolutely not.


Rest in peace, Danger.

Later in the library:

P: I still can’t believe that guy killed Danger.  I’m so mad.

Even later in the living room:

P: I’m gonna find the guy that killed Danger and raid his home.  He’ll be sorry he ever laid a finger on my donkey.

"Hello.  My name is P-dog Jenkins.  You killed my donkey.  Prepare to die."

“Hello. My name is P-dog Jenkins. You killed my donkey. Prepare to die.”

At dinner:

P: I’m still so mad.

Me: Well, how did he kill the donkey? I can’t imagine it’s very easy to kill a donkey.  They seem pretty resilient.

P: He punched him in the face until he was dead.

Joe: So, he was beating a dead horse?

Me: [giggle snorting laughter]

P: What?  I don’t get it.

The Boys and Their New Computers: A Conversation

My dudes got new computers this week.  They’re big and shiny and allow them to game at optimum efficiency.  The Peeshwank immediately started live-streaming on Black Ops 2 to a global audience, because apparently playing a video game just isn’t enough and there are evidently poor saps who get their thrills by watching other people game.  Yeah, it makes no sense to me either.

During his most recent live-stream, The Peeshwank was fighting zombies with some of his new little undead-eradicating friends.  He was yelling such things as “Come at me, bro” and “LEEROOOOOOOY JENKINS!” as he and his buddies were high-fiving one another over something that was apparently quite legit and Joe pipes in from his own gaming adventures:

“He’s got 99 problems, but a zombie ain’t one.”

I suspect I’m going to have to move my writing studio out of our library/office if I ever want to get work done again.

Call of Duty Black Ops 2 wallpaper 6

This is about what The Peeshwank’s room looks like right now…

Dream Journaling: The end of humanity.

Yeah, we’re gonna try that dream journaling thing again…

The apocalypse was upon us.  Buildings, cities, countries had been blown to smithereens in an all-out video game-style war the likes of which my two dudes have been training for their entire lives.  Of course we were amongst the rag-tag bunch of survivors.  Just us, all the guys I used to make indie films with and several other randoms.  (You always gotta have randoms to trip and leave behind when the zombies make their appearance.)

So, we’re hanging out and I’m trying to determine how to keep society alive while the film dudes were arguing about how to get just the right camera angle on the destruction around us.  “Hey guys, Youtube isn’t around anymore.  And the movie theater?  Yeah, that crumbles heap of ash right over there?  That’s it.”  But no one was paying me any mind.

I realized that the government had set up a think tank where the most brilliant minds had been sent to insure the survival of mankind.  We entered the tank to find it had been turned into an arena in which the “greatest minds of our time” had all constructed their very own Battlebots and were fighting them and placing bets, etc.  Apparently they had been in the think tank so long, they had gotten bored.  My dudes were positively elated and rejoiced at the site of the bots.

This is where humanity’s headed y’all.

BattleBots (video game)

Image via Wikipedia