My grassroots campaign to make bitching my occupation

I’ve watched 60 Minutes probably my whole life, because it comes on right in between football and Amazing Race, and also because apparently I’m a 70-year-old man living in a 30-something female’s body.

Now that Andy Rooney is retired, I was wondering who’s going to replace him.  I’m fairly certain I could do it.  I’m really good at bitching about stuff.  And I’m available.  And I’ll work cheap.  So Morley Safer, Mike Wallace, whoever, give me a call…  I’ve got a laundry list of things I could bitch on and on about and I promise, I’ll never let my eyebrows get as out of control as Andy’s are.  Promise.  And I make a killer cheesecake.  I’ll bet Andy never brought you guys cheesecake.

PS. And my first subject, “Why do they call it a laundry list?  Do people really write down a list of what’s in their laundry?”  See I’m being proactive here…

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